Easy numbers keep taking my hand,

with something blocking my synapse

Eyes keep meeting with no connection

still, I walk in their direction

fake smiles appear, my reaction to their attempt to please

Pretty, beautiful, full of life and hope

longing for love that will make me a wife.

Hollow feelings and incomplete interactions.

This cannot be life, This cannot be me living.

Rolling out of beds, taking names and forgetting

This will never be enough for me.

Never be enough for my soul,

never be enough to make me whole.

but still, i step out on the dancefloor of wasted time,

until i learn to live again



I once lived from bar to bar, soaking in the attention of anyone who wanted me. Knowing they weren’t the one or even close to being a spark. I just never wanted to be alone, as when I was alone I hated myself more. As I got fed up of trying to fake live in the world I create, fake friends I made, I chose to grow beyond that sham of a life. Stop hurting others with false hope and start healing myself one hated piece at a time.

Keep smiling.