Why do I have to change
just to please you
I’m not happy the way I am
But I’ll change in time everyone does
You can’t try to hurt me no more
I may hurt myself
But I refuse for you to hurt me
Stuff I may do, may sound silly
But I have done this to me
and now I’ll try to stop
when I look down the road
I can’t see past the now
And I won’t ever know
How my life would be
If I didn’t cut me
so don’t try bring me down
as i am already on the ground
so don’t try to change me
it’s something I will do eventually.
I wrote this in 2004 after I started hating myself and I harmed myself. This is not the end of my story as I grew stronger from the pain. Emotionally I have grown stronger and I am aware of the power I hold. I know more about myself and who I am due to the change I made on my perception of my self. I classed myself as worthless, no more though as I am priceless. Each of us has a purpose even if you cannot see it, you matter.
Keep Smiling.
3rdofthe3rd
3rdofthe3rd 
I’m glad these experiences have helped you grow and get stronger, the pain you’ve been through wasn’t for nothing. Thank you for sharing this, it’s such an honest, poignantly written piece. We are worth more than letting others hurt us, nor do we deserve to hurt ourselves. “Each of us has a purpose even if you cannot see it, you matter” – never forget your own wise words ♥
Caz xx
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Thank you Caz for your kind words, we all have strength within us. Sometimes we just forget it is there. Keep smiling and hope you’ve had a great day xx
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A tear falling down my cheek, I van heardly breathe… my heart is pounding fast and I have to read it over again-and again, because, it was like reading about my self, I can recognize myself again on your words🦋yhank you for sharing and I can read⭐️
(My English is not so good but I try the best and hope you understand what I’m write)
Love from Norway -orkidedatter-
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Your English is great, stop worrying. I’m glad that my writing is touching your soul. Please try not to cry and keep breathing we need you to stay around. – Din engelsk er flott, slutte å bekymre deg. Jeg er glad for at min skriving berører din sjel. Prøv å ikke gråte og fortsett å puste vi trenger deg til å holde deg rundt. Hold smilende Gibson x
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Thank you for your kind words, it’s warm my heart and I’m so greatful🦋
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I’m so glad you pushed through that phase to a strong, happier you.
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Thank you for your kind words, each day I grow. Have a great day.
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Life is a balance between holding on and letting go !
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I agree about the balance. Letting go is hard but everyday is a new day to try.
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So true ! 😇
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You are very important, its taken me all my life near enough to accept that I am not what my mother drilled into me. I have searched all my life for love, just to be loved for me. I found that in my Sons. You are special you have so much to give don’t forget that. You are gifted and I am here if you need me. I too harmed myself, in a strange way it helped, there are those that take great pleasure in causing pain, in seeing how far they can push one. Be strong you are stronger than you realize. (Sorry have not been in touch for sometime, been unfortunately rather ill, first day back slowly). Take care of yourself.
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Thank you so much Anna for your touching words. I’m sorry you have not been well. Fingers crossed back to fighting fit soon. We are all strong we just need to believe in that strength.
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